Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Dare 7

Hello, hello! It is so nice to tell you about my dares...and how I'm doing. I must admit, Zane came up with a third trait that annoys him: "Give me a number." I say that often to him in an attempt to purchase something big, like plane tickets, or a grand piano, or a harp (my latest big purchase desire because I have grown this interest to learn how to play). It drives Zane insane, because he knows deep down that if I want to fly to Colorado, and he says it will be too expensive, I will say, "Give me a number," and no matter what the number is that he gives me, I will find tickets for less. I pressure him so much. I don't stop long enough to read between the lines. What he is probably saying is, "We are so busy here, and I would like for us to save that money for a down payment on a house one day. Why don't we wait to take a trip to Colorado." You see, Zane never (at least to my knowledge) says 'no' for the sake of being mean. He always has some underlying reason. But me in my stubborness wants when I want, the way I want. Don't we all have a little bit (at least a little) of that in us? Not an attractive trait, so definitely one I will struggle through, and hopefully rid myself of.
"Love believes all things, hopes all things." 1 Corinthians 13:7
In today's love dare, Kendrick is focusing on two separate rooms that we have stored in our hearts. One room where we put all of our positive attributes that we find in our spouse. What we really appreciate about them. The second room is where we store all of our fights, our spouse's weaknesses, failures, what we 'depreciate.'
The 'appreciation room' for Zane is written with words like: kind, brilliant, romantic, great cook, provider, protector, lover, defender, noble, grateful, loyal, and honest. The more time I spend in this room, the more appreciative I am of him.
The 'depreciation room' for Zane may be written with words like: inconsiderate, selfish, discouraging. But, "everyone fails and has areas that need growth. Everyone has unresolved issues, hurts, and personal baggage...love knows about the Depreciation Room and does not live in denial that it exists. But love chooses not to live there."
If you look at the words listed in the separate room, they kind of contradict each other. The appreciation room is definitely more honest regarding Zane's true character and why I love him so much. The depreciation room is where I store words when I may not get my way, or we get into an argument. Words that are written out of frustration. Not love.
But, my love for Zane should compel me to believe the best about him. Focus on the positive. Love should lead my thoughts and my actions. The only reason why I should ever think about any negativity in Zane is so that I can pray for him. And, "the only reason (I) should ever go in the Depreciation Room is to write "covered in love" in huge letters across the walls."
"Your spouse is a living, breathing, endless book to be read. Dreams and hopes have yet to be realized. Talents and abilities may be discovered like hidden treasure. But the choice to explore them starts with a decision by you."
I am excited about today's dare! I like being positive, so today, I will focus on all the things I truly love about the world's greatest husband, my Zane.
Today's Dare: Get two sheets of paper. On the first one, spend a few minutes writing out positive things about your spouse. Then do the same with negative things on the second sheet. Place both sheets in a secret place for another day...to be used at a later time.
Yesterday's Dare: Don't be irritable.
Dare 5: Don't be rude.
Dare 4: Be thoughtful.
Dare 3: Be selfless.
Dare 2: Be kind.
Dare 1: Be patient.

--Inspired by 'The Love Dare,' by Kendrick.

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