Friday, April 30, 2010


Good morning! How are you doing today? I hope the morning is treating you well and that you are eagerly awaiting the weekend. While I hear there are supposed to be showers, I remain hopeful:)
I am still quite shaken up after yesterday. The questions still flood my mind, as well as Zane's, as to where did the cars that were in our lanes go? Traffic was thick, and everyone was driving so fast, and we weren't hit! Oh wow! I know it was a miracle, and I know for a fact that God's hands were controlling every vehicle surrounding us. But still. I am in such awe. Amazement. Just...pure joy. So, if I know yesterday's events were controlled by God, that He had his loving hands stop vehicles from hitting us, and His arms were surrounding us like a shield, why does my mind try to explain it? I know the events are unexplainable.
Have you ever been asked to think about what you will ask God the moment you see Him? I have never really had a question pop up in my mind. But dear friends, I will ask Him if He can replay yesterday so I can see every move He made. I am overwhelmed with all He did for us yesterday. Completely overwhelmed.
In my post, 'Insecurity,' I mentioned that I was insecure of being used by God. Would He even want to use me. Am I worthy of being used for His kingdom? I have been praying daily that God would empty me of myself and use me as a vessel for His glory. To allow me each day to be aware of my need for Him. (I did not mean scare the life out of me by causing my husband and I to spin out on I-285...perhaps I should be more specific...naw, I want Him to do whatever is necessary...but goodness!) After yesterday, it was amazingly clear that now is not the time for God to call me to be home with Him. He is not finished with me yet. In the plans that He crafted for me while He was knitting me together in my mother's womb, He planned out something to take place in the future. A plan that I am excitedly waiting for! I feel unexplainably blessed that the God of the universe, Creator of all things, saved me and Zane yesterday for a plan yet to be revealed. I hope you are excited too!
I was skimming through Psalms this morning, looking for a wonderful passage to fill my heart with today...after all, we know King David was always jotting down God's grace as He saved David from his enemies. This is what I found. The song of my heart for this moment. And I plan on remembering 4-29 each year as the day God rescued me. (Yes, even after salvation, God keeps watch over us and saves us. All the time, God is GOOD!!!)
Excerpts from Psalms 138. "On the day I called, You answered me; my strenth of soul You increased...Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You preserve my life;...The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me; Your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever."
Have a beautiful day. And remember, God has a special plan for your life. I am bubbling out of my skin waiting for Him to show me His plan! I hope you are too!

Thursday, April 29, 2010

I saw God today

Usually, I spend some time asking about your day...but I cannot wait any longer to tell you about my day!
My husband and I have been married just a few days over 1 year. We haven't seen our pre-marital counselor in a while, and we were blessed to be able to meet up with him in Marietta for lunch. (If you haven't been to Papasitta's Cantina, you need to go! The fajitas are delicious!) After lunch, we headed back to Lawrenceville for Zane to drop me off at work before heading home. That's when it happened...
We were in the fast lane, and needed to start getting over so we could exit I-285 and onto I-85. We merged into the lane to the right of us, and the girl in the next lane, no blinker, no checking to see us there, came over into our lane...never slowing down or swerving back into her lane despite Zane honking. Zane cut to the left but the car that had been behind us in the slow lane was already speeding by us, causing Zane to cut back to the right...while trying not to hit the girl that still did not know what was going on. There were three cars, us in the middle, and one on either side, sharing 2 lanes. There is absolutely no reason why Zane cutting back and forth trying to gain control of his car shouldn't have hit one of them. Then, we started spinning. As we were spinning I kept seeing cars speeding by and I was terrified we were going to get hit. We spun 2-3 times, stopping parellel over 2 lanes, my side facing oncoming traffic.
I saw hands. I saw two hands stretched out towards the oncoming traffic, and the cars heading towards us were already slowing down, the front two with their hazard lights on, moving over so that we could readjust ourselves. At first I thought they were my hands...but my hands were grasped around my hair, covering my ears and almost shielding my eyes. Dear friends. I firmly believe I saw God's hands today. I know without a shadow of doubt that had God not intervened, we would have been killed. We were going 75-80 miles an hour in Atlanta traffic, the middle of the day. It was extremely heavy. There were cars all around us before the near crash, but when we had finally spun to a stop, traffic had thinned out. No semis were around. And the cars in the fast lane had slowed enough that we were not hit. Not at all!
Friends, I am so thankful to be alive! All I was thinking when we first started fish-tailing was that I was going to lose my husband. All he was thinking was that he was going to lose me. But God protected us. He had His hands right there with us, guiding everything!
I do not know why God saved us. But I do know God is sovereign, and for whatever reason, He is not finished with us yet. It is not our time to go home to Him. He still has use for us here. I am so thankful, and...I absolutely cannot wait to see what God has in store for us. I am so vastly aware of my need for Him, especially during that time, and incredibly thankful that He stopped those cars.
Once we had merged onto I-85, one of the cars that had been near us while we were spinning just looked intently over at us. I'm absolutely sure he was thinking 'what just happened,' and 'how we were okay?'
Dears! Please, praise God with me today that we were saved! And we get to live another day! Please lift us up in prayer, and ask that we live each day as if it were a last. God has something for us to do! For all of us, as His children. I don't want to miss it.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010


It is such a beautiful day outside! I am loving the blue skies after several days of gloomy darkness. I hope you are enjoying your day and are filled with many moments of joy!
I just wanted to share a personal moment I had last night while talking with my little brother on the telephone. I am not sure if he meant to bless me and show me Christ...but he did, so I am going to share it with you! Yesterday, J-boy (my nickname for the best little brother in the world) had his 21st birthday. Time flies, doesn't it? I'm pretty sure my mother teared up a few times just thinking of him as a baby and how quickly he grew into track star and college kid. After playing phone tag all day, we finally were able to talk right before I went to bed. He was letting me know all he was doing for his birthday, and that he and his girlfriend were on their way to pick up some sparkling grape juice. So, I asked him: "Grape Juice? Why not wine? You are 21 now..." His response was priceless, and so mature! He may drink wine one day, but for now, while in school (he attends Lipscomb) and being surrounded by people who may look up to him, he does not want to do anything that may cause someone else to stumble.
Think about that for a moment. How many 21 year olds do you know that would NOT drink on their 21st birthday because other people may be watching and it could cause someone else to stumble. I am not saying my little brother has it all together. But I was filled with such joy when he told me that! It was so encouraging! And, something that we all would do well to consider. What things in our life do we participate in without any thought, that may cause someone to stumble? What can we ask God to change in our lives to make us more like Christ. More like an example to follow, and less like someone who fits in?
"Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother. I know and am persuaded in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself, but it is uncelan for anyone who thinks it unclean. For if your brother is grieved by what you eat, you are no longer walking in love. By what you eat, do not destroy the one for whom Christ died. So do not let what you regard as good be spoken of as evil. For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding. Do not, for the sake of food, destroy the work of God. Everything is indeed clean, but it is wrong for anyone to make another stumble by what he eats. It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble. The faith that you have, keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who has no reason to pass judgement on himself for what he approves. But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin." Romans 14:13-23 (ESV).
Have an incredibly blessed day, and I hope our actions are done today while abiding in Christ and following His perfect, pure, and holy example.

Monday, April 26, 2010


"Fight for us, O God, that we may not drift numb and blind and foolish into vain and empty excitements. Life is too short, too precious, too painful to waste on worldly bubbles that burst. Heaven is too great, hell is too horrible, eternity is too long that we should putter around on the porch of eternity."--John Piper

God is so good!

I think that we need to understand something. Understand it, and believe it. God is gracious enough to right any wrong. Loving enough to accept us the way we are. But caring enough to compel us to change. While God accepts us as the broken and dirty people we are when we ask Him to be our Saviour, He does not let us stay that way. He compels us to change. Our love for Him compels us to change. Our longing to be in intimacy with Him compels us to change. It is impossible to live a life of sin as children of God. 1 John 5:18 says "We know that everyone who has been born of God does not keep on sinning but he who was born of God protects him, and the evil one does not touch him." As children of God, God grasps us so tightly that we cannot be consumed by sin. He will save us. Will we stumble and fall? Absolutely. But God will not give us over to the evil one. If we are true believers, He will protect us from Satan.

We cannot call ourselves Christians and not live a life set-apart from nonbelievers. Christ set us apart when He saved us! We need to be praying daily that God will break us down and continue molding us to His will!

I know this is not as uplifting as I try to make my blogs be. However, there is a sadness in the Western Church causing people to believe they are saved yet there is no fruit. Please, take a moment and read John 15. I know this chapter is really familiar, but take the time to read it with fresh eyes. Let it swarm within you. Let's examine our lives and see where branches are not being productive and ask God to change us. Oh please, God change me!

Have you read it? Do you see areas in your life that are bearing fruit? If so, HALLELUJAH! I love when God uses us as vessels! If you don't, do not break yourself down about it. Rather, ask God to break you (He can do so in a much more loving way than we can) and show you areas of your life that need changing.

"Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness," Romans 6:13.
Have an incredibly blessed day! Go out and bear fruit!

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Outrageously Loved

I just got home from the Beth Moore simulcast on 'So Long, Insecurity.' I feel so blessed right now. No...I AM so blessed! I am very thankful that God allowed me to be a part of that simulcast. There were over 300,000 women participating throughout North America. 300,000 Women! Can you imagine if all 300,000 of us allow ourselves to be molded into the security of Jesus Christ! Can we even fathom what that would look like? 300,000 women walking around in North America as secure as can be and living and breathing God's sovereign and never-ending security! It literally gives me chills thinking about it.
Okay, I promised you I would share...but let's be honest! I am a note taker, and this really will be a novel if tell you everything I wrote down that spoke to me. So I will share only what God is laying on my heart to tell you. I hope Beth Moore doesn't mind, but I will be quoting her and passing to you what Jesus spoke through her, to me, today. Are you with me? If so, let me start by saying you are outrageously loved by God and He longs for you to find your security in Him! I hope you do. Goodness...I hope I do! I can already feel Him at work in my life, fixing my insecurities. Turning me to security in Him. Give me a minute...I am so excited for this day spent with God...I just must shout out YIPPEE!!!!
Whew. Okay. I feel like a child right now. First things first: You cannot gain from your insecurity. Really. Think about that for a moment. You cannot gain a single thing from your insecurity. Nope. Don't even try to argue with me. Nothing. Except...more insecurity. If we are insecure in something, which I gather we all struggle with it at some point, then we need deliverance. Deliverance from bondage. People can pray for us as much as they want, that we will be delivered. But when it comes down to it, we must choose to be delivered by God. It is a choice. Just you and God can make it. Some people may argue that their bondage is a weakness...and God may be glorified in your weakness by making you strong. Please, hear me for a minute. I believe Beth Moore led me to a revelation when she said this: "Insecurity is not a weakness. It is unbelief." Ponder that. If any of us are so consumed in our insecurity that we believe we can never be secure...then we do not believe God can do all things. And dear ones...He can! He can! When I think God may not use me for His kingdom...shame on me! That insecurity I have is unbelief. He can use me! And He will! He formed a purpose for me long before I was conceived, and God will ensure that purpose is fulfilled. I just pray my eyes and ears are opened wide enough that I don't miss it! That I realize God is working and moving.
I do not want to fill you with too many questions...but I do want to highlight a point real fast. Many of us try to manage our strongholds instead of just being free. This is so important I need to say it again, for me to hear as well: Many of us try to manage our strongholds instead of just being free. Wow. That convicts me so deeply! Does it have any effect on you? Think of strongholds in your life. Maybe it is alcoholism, lust, idolatry, lying, unforgiveness, selfishness. It could be any number of things. How many times in our life do we try to manage our strongholds? Set a limit and keep it for a while. Not going 'too' far but going far enough to get our fix...or as Francis Chan states in Crazy Love: "How far can I go before it is considered a sin?" instead of "How can I keep myself pure as a temple of the Holy Spirit?"
Friends, let's encourage each other to be set apart. To live differently. To break free from the bondage that insecurity ties us to. Not looking good enough. Not singing well enough. Not getting an 'A,' or the lead role in the high school play, or 1st place at the track meet. Any of these things, and countless other examples, cause us to be insecure. Saying, 'if only I could' or 'if only I had,' rather than finding security in the many blessings we do have bind us to a life that lets us gain nothing. Find security in the beautiful person you are. Let's find security in God, who loves us outrageously, and knew exactly what He was doing when He made me and you. You are beautiful to Him. And there is nothing you can do that will take His love away. Let that change the way you and I live.
Have a wonderful evening, and thank you so much for sharing this with me today!

Friday, April 23, 2010

Better Than

How has your evening been? Joyous? Calm? I'm so glad you have decided to stop by! It is too late for me to have my cup of hot tea...because it is caffeinated and I plan on waking up early on my Saturday morning to listen to Beth Moore. That is right! She is coming to Atlanta so I will be sitting in at a satellite location, listening to her for some rough 8 hrs tomorrow. Yes, I am excited! And yes, I will take notes and fill you in.
Have you heard Amy Grant's latest single, "Better than a Hallelujah?" I love the words in that song. While the music is not quite what I enjoy most, the words are really deep. Her song is filled with explaining the simple notion that sometimes pouring out the longings of our heart are better than a hallelujah. I cannot tell you how many times friends have told me that something important to them is not worth bothering God about. Or, they haven't prayed about it yet, but maybe they will later...if it is still bothering them. Friends, I have said those same things! Sometimes matters seem too trivial to us and we want God to focus on more 'important' things. While I understand our reasoning behind it, God longs for us to tell Him everything. In fact, we experience intimacy with Christ when we are abiding in Him. Do you know what that means? That means remaining in constant prayer...and yes, pouring out our desires, our pains, our longings...laying our burdens down. Sometimes, basking in the silence of God's presence and waiting to hear Him.
I am not saying to forget raising your hands and lifting up a hallelujah to our Saviour! Please, do not misunderstand me. "The Lord is a strong hold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. And those who know Your name put their trust in You, for You, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek You" Psalms 9:9-10 (ESV). That is reason enough to lift up your praises while laying your burdens down. Jesus will never leave you or forsake you. He promises us that! (DT 31:6 and Heb 13:5.) But please, be assured, your troubles, and your joys, are never so minimal that our Father does not want to hear about them.
I will leave you with the lyrics from the song and would love for you to pay attention to them. Let them bless your heart!
God loves a lullaby in a mother's tears in the dead of night better than a hallelujah sometimes. God loves the drunkard's cry; the soldiers plea not to let him die, better than a hallelujah sometimes. The woman holding onto life, the dying man giving up the fight, are better than a hallelujah sometimes. The tears of shame for what's been done, the silence when the words won't come, are better than a hallelujah sometimes. Better than a church bell ringing. Better than a choir singing. We pour out our miseries and God just hears a melody. Beautiful the mess we are, the honest cries of breaking hearts...are better than a hallelujah.

Be blessed dear friends!

Thursday, April 22, 2010


Do you have your hot tea to sip on? I sure do hope so! I am about to drink Tazo Joy--black, green, and oolong teas--a celebratory blend of select rare teas. I will let you know if it makes me more joyous!
How are you today? Has it been a rough morning? Perhaps a rough week? Oh, dear friends. Sometimes the road is unbearably hard. And long. I have many dear people close to me who are going through extremely rough times right now. I will not get into any of the details...but have you ever been close to a situation and wanted so badly to help, but there truly is not anything you can personally do to help the pain. It kind of makes you feel helpless doesn't it? I spent my full hour drive this morning casting a burden upon the Lord, begging Him to mend those around me who are in more pain than I could ever imagine. But lovelies, God is in control. Of all things. He is not surprised by anything that happens in your life, and He has a plan! Wait not upon the event going on in your life to be resolved. Wait upon the Lord! I was bewildered during a study of Esther by Beth Moore to realize a concept so obvious...but never understood! Have you ever been praying repeatedly, and feeling consistently weaker than the moment before because you are so burdened, and asked the Lord why? He promises to renew our strength: "but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint" Isa 40:31. So why, when He promises this, do we get so tired? Because we are waiting on something to happen. We want our problems to just disappear. We want to lay our burdens down at the feet of Jesus and in OUR time, which is usually immediately, Him to make everything perfect--the way we would define perfect, and the way we want the situation resolved. Dear friends, that is not what the scripture says. We are not taught to wait upon an event. We are told to wait upon the Lord. In His time, all things will be made perfect, be made good, be made right. Cast your burdens on Him, and wait on His time. (I know, easier said than done.)
In the book Crazy Love, Francis Chan reminds me "if life were stable, I'd never need God's help...If life is going great, remember that God has given you this good stuff so that you can show the world a person who enjoys blessings, but who is still totally obsessed with God...If life is a struggle though, God has allowed hard things in your life so you can show the world that your God is great and that knowing Him brings peace and joy, even when life is hard..."
I want you to go and listen to a song now. I want you to listen so intently that you cannot help but to let your soul sing the words with you. I hope you find encouragement in it. And know, God loves you more than you will ever know! Let Him wrap you in His loving arms and fill you with peace like a river. The storm may be raging right now, but Jesus is your shelter, and He can calm any storm.
Now go! Listen to Ginny Owens' song "If You want me to." The lyrics are below if you want to follow along. I love you all, and have a blessed day!
The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear. And I don't know the reason why You brought me here. But just because You love me the way that You do, I'm going to walk through the valley if You want me to. Cause I'm not who I was when I took my first steps. And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet. So if all of these trials bring me closer to You, then I will walk through the fire if You want me to. It may not be the way I would have chosen, when You lead me through a world that is not my home. But You never said it would be easy. You only said I'd never go alone. So when the whole world turns against me and I'm all by myself. And I can't hear You answer my cries for help. I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through, and I will walk through the valley if You want me to. Because when I cross over Jordan, I'm going to sing, I'm going to shout! I'm going to look into Your eyes and see YOU NEVER LET ME DOWN! So take me on the pathway that leads me home to You, and I will walk through the valley...if You want me to.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010


Good morning! I love that it is the middle of the week...almost the weekend!

Tuesday evenings I partake in the women's biblestudy at my church. It has been such a blessing to be surrounded by so many women, many at different stages in life, many with complex issues, and all beautiful children of God. I love being with women and sharing about God--what He is doing in our lives at the moment, and what we need Him to be doing in the future. But what a reminder every Tuesday is that God is in control!!!

Last night was our first study on our new book, So Long, Insecurity, by Beth Moore. Oh wow! At first, I didn't want to study this book--let's be honest for a minute. No one wants to admit that they are insecure! We can be in such denial that denying our insecurity makes us even less secure. Goodness. It can drive a person crazy! I wanted to share with you a little of what we went over last night, and then I am going to me honest about my own insecurities so that you can walk with me as God makes me secure.

First, we just went over the first two chapters. But how it opened my eyes to the fact that we set ourselves up to be insecure. Think about it for a minute. When was the last time you felt insecure? For me, my expectations often times cause my insecurity. I expect a situation to go a certain way, and when it doesn't I wonder what I did wrong? Why did so-and-so react that way? What could have been done differently? I am going to quote Beth Moore for a moment: "Ironically, although insecure people are easily and frequently hurt, they are usually unaware of how they are unwitting accomplices in creating their own misery." If you ask me, that is ironic! However, I can really look back over my life and see how I set myself up!

We also cause our insecurities by looking in the wrong places. Many of us look in love relationships to feel loved, to be told we are beautiful, to be needed. We shop for the most fashionable clothes. We want the nice home in the popular neighborhood. Or the new 2011 Kia Sorento with two sun roofs. (Okay, I want the new 2011 Kia Sorento!) We so often forget to remember that all these things are trivial in the long run--they will all waste away. We can only find our security in Jesus Christ, yet for some reason, He is often the last place we look to. Why is that? Why do we always ignore the One who is our constant shelter?

We spoke of lonliness. Oh how we hate to be alone. And in truth, we are not supposed to be alone. God even said it is not good for man to be alone. Yet, so often we feel alone. We can't find anyone to relate to where we are in life, or if we can, they might not care. What if they do care, but we will not let ourselves believe they are sincere? What in our life has caused us to believe no one can truly want to be around us? Right now, can you please take a moment and pray for those around you who you know are struggling with lonliness. Lift them up. If you are able, have them over for coffee. If you are struggling with lonliness, come and visit me! I would love to have you over!

I know I have already written quite a bit, but please bare with me. My very first entry on here was a request for you to join me on my journey and pray for me as I go along. I will share some of my insecurities in hopes that you can come along side me and watch as God molds me to be more secure in Him. After all, He is the potter, and I am merely the clay.

1) I am insecure about this blog! I never know if I am wording something correctly. I am unsure if you even understand what I am saying. I want this to be a joyful time in your day, but what if it is boring, and disinterests you?

2) I am insecure about my musical abilities. While I know God has given me gifts, right now in this moment of my life, He is not using them. It makes me wonder if my time has passed. Am I no longer gifted?

3) I am insecure about my marriage. What woman cannot relate? I know how dearly my husband loves me, and I know how much I love him, but I set myself up to be disappointed. I truly am an unwitting accomplice in creating my misery. Our life is not going to be out of The Notebook. Our marriage will be better! We have the opportunity and responsibility to represent Christ and the church! If I am insecure about this one, I am definitely seeking security in the wrong place! Oh may Jesus make my security be rooted in Him!

4) I am insecure that God will use me. That He wants to use me. I grew up wanting so badly to be a singer. And then, in 2004, I developed a huge passion for Romania and wanted to be a missionary there. I have these ideas of being used in a big way, yet God hasn't used me in the ways I imagined, so does He even want to use me?

These are just a few of my insecurities. Please, feel free to laugh at them, or cry over them...but I hope you will pray that I will grow secure in them.

Let me leave you with some encouragement, straight out of So Long, Insecurity. Scripture claims that believers in Christ are enormously gifted people. The enemy of your soul has a tremendous amount to gain if you don't deal with your insecurities. Know that if you know Jesus Christ personally, He has chosen you, too, and has appointed you to accomplish something good. Something that matters. Something prepared for you before time began (Ephesians 2:10). Something meant to have a serious impact within your sphere of influence. (That is a blessing to hear. He will use me. In a serious way!)

"In your pursuit of God-vested security, the only relationships in your life that will suffer rather than improve are the significantly unhealthy ones...Let Him get to that terrified part of you that devalues the rest of you."

Dear friends, have a blessed day today, and don't be insecure. You are so beautiful, and God longs to make us be more secure than we ever imagined!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Last Days

When I first arrived at the office this morning, I went into the breakroom and heard two ladies talking about one of their mothers who recently passed. The lady said, "It is okay. I know how much she was looking forward to being with the Lord."
It reminded me of my granddad. Last year, my husband and I traveled to Memphis--well, Moscow, a little town outside of Memphis--to visit my grandparents and the Aunt and Uncle they live with. Though driving through Alabama is not the most enjoyable trip in the world, I got a glimpse of something incredible while visiting with my granddad that I had never seen before. At the end of every day, my grandparents sit down to watch the Gaithers sing several praise songs. After listening to a few, I looked over to see my granddad crying--there was such a longing in his tear-filled eyes. Can you imagine following the Lord for a lifetime and just wanting to be with him? In heaven with Him?
I don't think that is crazy. My granddad loves his life on earth. He has a beautiful wife, my grandmother, and great children and grandchildren...hopefully he will live to see great-grandchildren as well. But my granddad longs to be with his Saviour in His Kingdom! He LONGS for it. Do you know what that is like? I don't. To think of it, I then start thinking of all the memories on earth I have yet to create. Oh but to be at that point where every song drops you to your knees and brings tears to your eyes--my granddad can look at Jesus every moment of the day and say, "I am ready and willing to come home. I cannot wait to see you!"
I think that is so powerful. I love that I was able to witness it, and I long for God to mold my heart so closely to His that I have that same longing in my eyes.
I love you, Granddad.
Have a wonderful morning everyone!

Monday, April 19, 2010

Recent Review

I came across a post just a moment ago on my myspace page. I do not know why, but I had the sudden urge to reread the previous blogs I had posted on myspace since 2006! It truly was interesting to read about what God was teaching me then...and how immature some of those blogs sounded! Oh wow!

If you have one, get out your journal from several years ago and reread some entries. You might cry, or laugh...or just reminisce, but I believe God can still teach us what we refused to learn years ago through old memories that we recall and look for His presence during them.

The most recent blog on my myspace page was from April 20, 2008. One day shy of two years ago. It is so interesting where my heart was and how much God had let me in on...oh His plans are so perfect aren't they! I know...sometimes in the midst of them we think He may not be paying attention, but friend, He is. He always is. Just remember His will is better than ours...that is such a hard truth to learn and believe! Oh to have undying belief in that! I cannot explain how much I waver in my faith when it comes to my will vs. His will. I do not know why I waver! He has proven Himself true over and over and over again. But how quickly we sometimes forget!

I realize I am straying from what I was initially blogging myspace blog...but just for a moment, as you sip your tea/coffee, think back over your life. In what areas has God proven His will to be good and perfect? My husband and I recently recalled all the times God has worked good in our lives just since knowing each other...that is a little over 2 1/2 years...and we had so much to be thankful for! It wowed both of us that there were so many things God had worked together for good and we hadn't even noticed until we took the time to think about it. Will you take a moment and think about the last 2 1/2 years of your life? What all has God done in your life that you may have looked over....or that you didn't look over and clearly saw His will was so much better than yours?

Have you thought about it? If so, welcome back! I hope you enjoyed looking back over your life! Okay, real fast, the interesting thing about my blog: upon writing it, Zane and I had been dating for 3 weeks, and do you know what I was writing about? How much good God had worked in my life. How faithful He had been when I needed Him. I was writing about how blessed I was and how undeserving. Haha...I was saying how excited I was for the rest of my life. That this blessing God had just given me was for the rest of my life. I was writing about my husband! He had not put the ring on my finger yet, nor asked my daddy's permission, but he was the one. The man made just for me. And I knew it in my core.

I hope you have had similar experiences in your life that made you just overflow with joy. I hope that you WILL have them, continually. God is always there, and He loves us so much. Sometimes, we just need people to remind us that He hasn't forgotten us.

Have a blessed day!

Sunday, April 18, 2010


Fitting title since today is my 1 year anniversary with my husband! I cannot explain how thankful I am for Zane. God provided me with someone I had been praying for my whole life! Someone my mom had been praying for. Really! She knew before I did. I mean, I knew Zane was special, but my mom upon meeting him for the first time (we weren't even dating yet!) told me he was the one. Looking at Zane was like looking at her son. My how clear it was to her after praying for 22 years for this man that God had answered her prayers.
I long to be the kind of prayer warrior that when God answers a prayer it is abundantly clear. Have you ever had a similar experience happen? Oh how great it must feel to just...see Him answering prayers in the midst of it!
Since it is my anniversary, I don't want to take up much time here. I mean, we are celebrating something! I just wanted to say that God has been so great and blessed me so much. Zane and I have learned so much...what I take personally, what irritates him, how to NOT to communicate. But above all, we are learning how to love. Love outside ourselves. Choose to love more. I cannot wait for the many more things we have to learn with each other. Praise God that he has given me someone to learn with that is so patient, so kind, so forgiving, and so loving.
Have an incredibly blessed day!

Friday, April 16, 2010

Being the Church

Have you read Ephesians 5? The chapter that makes many women cringe as they are told to be 'submissive' and 'honoring' to their husbands. Can I just tell you I love that chapter!?
I have been married almost one year. It has been a joy! Ups and downs, but I would not trade any of my memories for any thing! I have to say that the best thing about being engaged was the Pre-marital counseling my hubby and I received. During that, we studied Ephesians 5. Zane was encouraged in what it means to 'be Christ' and die for his wife. I was encouraged in what it means to 'be the church' and through that be submissive and honor my husband. Now, my idea of honoring my husband is not doing something I know my husband would not be thrilled about. In my stubbornness, I have fallen short of being honoring in many things. It is definitely an attribute I want more of in my life--less of me. Being submissive...well, I can be obedient, but don't think for a moment I don't question why my husband might want things a certain way. However, even through my questioning, I know it would not be honoring, nor submissive, if I didn't follow through with whatever my hubby desires. I would love to be a wife my husband can say in all circumstances I honor him, and I submit to him...if he said that though, it would be a lie.
But, when I got married, I had to understand my stubbornness was going to need to be put aside. I would not always get my way, I may get my feelings hurt, I may even be wrong (Oh how I hate when that happens!!!). But if in our marriage we are going to strive to reflect Christ and the church through our relationship with each other, I must understand the beauty of the commands in Ephesians 5. Before you get all riled up about being 2nd class to your husband, know that by men being called to act as Christ in the marriage they are called to DIE to us. Do you grasp the depth of that? Die to us. I don't know about you, but that is a scary command. One that we women can take advantage of if we manipulate our men. Oh how I pray God does not let me use that against my husband. Do you see? In our marriage, our husbands are to understand our needs, our desires, the things our heart longs for, and literally TEND to them. By doing so, they are dying to us. How can we not honor and submit to our mates when they are tending to our desire for love, compassion, care--goodness...and an ear to listen when we have had a long day! This command also gives husbands the duty of, well, to put it bluntly, keeping us in check. Telling us when they think something isn't a good idea. When a sale item is still too much. When they really want us to not plan that trip. It could be a number of things. But unless their minds change, we are to honor them. Submit to them. In doing so, we are honoring and submitting to Christ. That is beautiful. Who knew that by bending to my husband I can be pleasing to my Saviour at the same time. How I hope I can grow in this, and learn to do so with a good attitude.

Thursday, April 15, 2010


I hope you are sipping a wonderful cup of green tea, or coffee if that is your choice of drink:) I am enjoying my cup right now....

A dear friend of mine has started reading through the Bible in chronological order. I need to do the same! I have read through the Bible before, but that was years ago. I have lived so much since then and seen God so clearly in my life....I bet the same passages I read so long ago would speak to me in such a different way now. And how I love reading about all the Lord has done!

Right now my friend is reading about the Isrealites being stranded in the wilderness. It does not matter how many times God reveals His glory, His abundant blessings, Himself!!! The people continue to stray, make false idols, grumble and complain. It really hits me hard.

Some of you may not know this, but each morning, I have a good hour long drive to work. You might think that is crazy, but it is actually a blessing. I do not have an antenna for my car causing the reception of my favorite radio station to not come in until I have been driving 20-30 minutes. For the last 10 months (that is how long I have been working at MTW) I have used that 20-30 minutes to pray. To speak to God. To be in His presence. Can I tell you how much I take that for granted? Back in the old testament, only Aaron was allowed to enter all the way into the Temple. Only Aaron! And there were so many things to be done first: sacrifices, cleansing, burning of incense. Since Jesus came and pardoned us for all time, we are welcome and invited to come before God's presence whenever we want! Do you grasp that? Far too often I take that for granted. I am praying for God to make me more aware of who He make me be in awe before His throne. To know WHO I'M TALKING TO! Do you understand what I mean? I cannot believe how many times my mind quickly goes to how slow the person in front of me is driving, or the poor dead deer on the side of highway 316...I am in the middle of talking to the King of Kings, and my mind wonders off to countless things! Oh, would God make me aware!

But this is not what caught me while reading through my friend's blogs of the Scripture she is studying at the moment. What caught me was how many times we forget God's provision in our lives. How often He takes care of us and we immediately forget and go on asking for something very trivial, that does not matter in this life. I do not know about you, but I pray God will make me abundantly aware of His many blessings, and I fall to my knees in Thanksgiving. I hope that as God teaches me and molds me that He will make me more and more a person filled with Thanksgiving and less and less a person who asks for material and trite things.

Have a beautiful day! May we each see our blessings and be thankful!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Are you Christ?

I have been blessed to be a part of an encouraging and convicting biblestudy the last several weeks. Ever since I moved to Athens with my husband, God has been placing me in the right bible studies allowing me to see His word come alive and become more real to me than it ever has before. Oh how I love reading His word and not wanting to put down my Bible! God is so good! And He loves us so much! I hope you can be drawn into intimacy with Him and find His word as loving, caring, and full of hope.
Right now I am reading Crazy Love with my Life Group. The author is Francis Chan and he is determined to get the lukewarm christian to wake up and live for Christ! How can you be a christian without living for Christ? I have become more and more convicted about how my life is supposed to be different. I should not fit in. As a christian, if my life makes sense to an unbeliever, than I am not living as Christ wants me to. I hope Francis Chan doesn't mind, but I am going to share with you the many thoughts I had during the latest chapter of Crazy Love--Your best life...later.
Serving Christ just when it is convenient for me is not serving Him at all. God would rather me not worship, then go through the motions without my whole heart, soul, and mind being in it. I cannot count how many times I have come before God in prayer and just treated Him as if He were a friend riding in my passenger seat. Don't get me wrong. He is my friend. But He is far more. I have the opportunity every moment to come before the throne of God! And so often, I don't even grasp it! How dare me ever come before His throne and not be in awe. Not be overwhelmed! Not be speechless. Sometimes, don't you think God wants us to shut up and listen? Bask in His glory? Close our eyes and in His presence. Sometimes I can get so lost in all my requests that I forget who I am talking to. Shame on me! I have a choice to make: I can just let life happen, which is tantamount to serving God my leftovers, or I can actively run toward Christ.
I can tell you what I want to do...what I know I need to do...oh, God give me the strength and endurance to run toward you!
In order to praise God fully, I have to do things in this life that will cost me on earth. I need to live recklessly for Him. I need to live as if each person I came in contact with were Christ. Does that seem blasphemous? Outrageous? Think about it for a moment. How would your life change if you actually thought of each person you came into contact with as Christ?
In Matthew 25, Jesus says that when we feed the hungry, give drink to the thirsty, clothe the naked, give aid to the sick--whatever you do for the least of these you do for Him. Jesus is saying that we show tangible love for God in how we care for the poor and those who are suffering. He expects us to treat the poor and the desperate as if they are Christ Himself.
Wow! I can tell you I do not do that! But oh how I want to learn to see each person as Christ and treat them with love! Nothing short of all encompassing, Christ-centered, love!
I know I am typing so much...let me leave you with just this thought. By loving just one person, how much further can that compassion go? You will never know...but is it not worth it to know it might reach beyond your wildest hope?!
Have a blessed day!

Tuesday, April 13, 2010


Life is a journey, a dance, a song. For me, life should never stand still. There might be a moment where the road is winding, changing into something even more brilliant than before. A key change, a shimmy, a skip. But whether the road is turning or staying straight, I hope we are compeled towards something. That something is drawing us in. For me, I long for every step I take to be one pulling me closer to Christ. I want to run towards Him. Run fast, run hard, with the peddle of my feet, my breath, and the dust to make a sound just for Him. For His kingdom. For His glory.
Sarah Reeves sings it perfectly in her song, "Sweet, Sweet Sound." May this be true for me as well. "I am an instrument of the living God. My life a melody to His name. More than the songs I sing, worship is everything. I live to glorify my King. Hear the song of my life! May it be a sweet, sweet sound. May it be a sweet, sweet sound. I raise this anthem high. May it be a sweet, sweet sound. A sweet, sweet sound. Through all the mire and clay You are washing me with grace. You carry me, O Lord, through it all. So I will testify, even in the fire, I live to praise my Saviour."
Praise God that He sent His Son to die for my sins so that I may come before the throne of the King of Kings and ask such a crazy question: May I be more like Jesus?
Will you join me on my journey? As I blog, question me. Encourage me. I want this to be a time where we can share a cup of Green Tea with a dab of honey. Laugh together. Cry together. And most importantly, meet with Jesus together. I love you all, and I pray this will be a joyful moment in your day.