Good morning! I love that it is the middle of the week...almost the weekend!
Tuesday evenings I partake in the women's biblestudy at my church. It has been such a blessing to be surrounded by so many women, many at different stages in life, many with complex issues, and all beautiful children of God. I love being with women and sharing about God--what He is doing in our lives at the moment, and what we need Him to be doing in the future. But what a reminder every Tuesday is that God is in control!!!
Last night was our first study on our new book, So Long, Insecurity, by Beth Moore. Oh wow! At first, I didn't want to study this book--let's be honest for a minute. No one wants to admit that they are insecure! We can be in such denial that denying our insecurity makes us even less secure. Goodness. It can drive a person crazy! I wanted to share with you a little of what we went over last night, and then I am going to me honest about my own insecurities so that you can walk with me as God makes me secure.
First, we just went over the first two chapters. But how it opened my eyes to the fact that we set ourselves up to be insecure. Think about it for a minute. When was the last time you felt insecure? For me, my expectations often times cause my insecurity. I expect a situation to go a certain way, and when it doesn't I wonder what I did wrong? Why did so-and-so react that way? What could have been done differently? I am going to quote Beth Moore for a moment: "Ironically, although insecure people are easily and frequently hurt, they are usually unaware of how they are unwitting accomplices in creating their own misery." If you ask me, that is ironic! However, I can really look back over my life and see how I set myself up!
We also cause our insecurities by looking in the wrong places. Many of us look in love relationships to feel loved, to be told we are beautiful, to be needed. We shop for the most fashionable clothes. We want the nice home in the popular neighborhood. Or the new 2011 Kia Sorento with two sun roofs. (Okay, I want the new 2011 Kia Sorento!) We so often forget to remember that all these things are trivial in the long run--they will all waste away. We can only find our security in Jesus Christ, yet for some reason, He is often the last place we look to. Why is that? Why do we always ignore the One who is our constant shelter?
We spoke of lonliness. Oh how we hate to be alone. And in truth, we are not supposed to be alone. God even said it is not good for man to be alone. Yet, so often we feel alone. We can't find anyone to relate to where we are in life, or if we can, they might not care. What if they do care, but we will not let ourselves believe they are sincere? What in our life has caused us to believe no one can truly want to be around us? Right now, can you please take a moment and pray for those around you who you know are struggling with lonliness. Lift them up. If you are able, have them over for coffee. If you are struggling with lonliness, come and visit me! I would love to have you over!
I know I have already written quite a bit, but please bare with me. My very first entry on here was a request for you to join me on my journey and pray for me as I go along. I will share some of my insecurities in hopes that you can come along side me and watch as God molds me to be more secure in Him. After all, He is the potter, and I am merely the clay.
1) I am insecure about this blog! I never know if I am wording something correctly. I am unsure if you even understand what I am saying. I want this to be a joyful time in your day, but what if it is boring, and disinterests you?
2) I am insecure about my musical abilities. While I know God has given me gifts, right now in this moment of my life, He is not using them. It makes me wonder if my time has passed. Am I no longer gifted?
3) I am insecure about my marriage. What woman cannot relate? I know how dearly my husband loves me, and I know how much I love him, but I set myself up to be disappointed. I truly am an unwitting accomplice in creating my misery. Our life is not going to be out of The Notebook. Our marriage will be better! We have the opportunity and responsibility to represent Christ and the church! If I am insecure about this one, I am definitely seeking security in the wrong place! Oh may Jesus make my security be rooted in Him!
4) I am insecure that God will use me. That He wants to use me. I grew up wanting so badly to be a singer. And then, in 2004, I developed a huge passion for Romania and wanted to be a missionary there. I have these ideas of being used in a big way, yet God hasn't used me in the ways I imagined, so does He even want to use me?
These are just a few of my insecurities. Please, feel free to laugh at them, or cry over them...but I hope you will pray that I will grow secure in them.
Let me leave you with some encouragement, straight out of So Long, Insecurity. Scripture claims that believers in Christ are enormously gifted people. The enemy of your soul has a tremendous amount to gain if you don't deal with your insecurities. Know that if you know Jesus Christ personally, He has chosen you, too, and has appointed you to accomplish something good. Something that matters. Something prepared for you before time began (Ephesians 2:10). Something meant to have a serious impact within your sphere of influence. (That is a blessing to hear. He will use me. In a serious way!)
"In your pursuit of God-vested security, the only relationships in your life that will suffer rather than improve are the significantly unhealthy ones...Let Him get to that terrified part of you that devalues the rest of you."
Dear friends, have a blessed day today, and don't be insecure. You are so beautiful, and God longs to make us be more secure than we ever imagined!