"Where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God." --Ruth 1:16
Love is a covenant. I must say, this blog is difficult to write. Not because I disagree with it. I wholeheartedly believe and know that love is a covenant. It is difficult because a dear friend is going through a divorce. We spoke yesterday and I told her, "You should know...I am praying for reconciliation between you two. That you both will grow closer to Christ and that God will heal your wounds." After telling me her husband was moving closer to Christ and definitely on the right track, her response devastated me and let me know that her mind had been made up. She thanked me for praying for her, but asked that I pray God will grant them both peace with their decision to go through with the divorce. She was seeking after God, enjoying being in His will and living her life the way God wanted her to...but she was no longer going to be married. There was to much pain and she was done being his wife.
"The experience and challenge of loving your mate is something that never comes to an end. Consider your marriage a covenant instead of a contract. Seeing marriage as a contract is like saying to your spouse, 'I take you for me and we'll see if this works out.' But realizing it as a covenant changes it to say, 'I give myself to you and commit to this marriage for life.'" (Kendrick)
There are many differences between a contract and a covenant. A contract is usually a written agreement based on distrust, outlining the conditions and consequences if broken. It is self-serving, and comes with limited liability. A covenant is a verbal commitment based on trust, assuring someone that your promise is unconditional and good for life. It is spoken before God out of love for another. A covenant is intended to be unbreakable.
Please grab your Bible and read through some of God's covenants with His people. Genesis 9:12-17; Genesis 17:1-8; Exodus 19:3-6; 2 Samuel 7:7-16; Hebrews 9:15. Dwell on those Covenants. Realize that God has kept every single one.
"There's good reason why God was the One who initiated covenants with His people. He alone is able to fulfill the demands of His own promises...but the Spirit of God is within you by virtue of your faith in His Son and the grace bestowed upon you in salvation. That means you now can exercise your role as covenant keeper, no matter what may arise to challenge your faithfulness to it...marriage is not a contract with escape clauses and exception wordings. Marriage is a covenant intended to cut off all avenues of retreat or withdrawal. There's nothing in all the world that should sever what God has joined together" (Kendrick).
For thousands of years people have wondered why at times God withholds His blessings from their homes and marriages. "You say, 'for what reason?' Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant...For I hate divorce, says the lord, the God of Israel, and him who covers his garment with wrong, says the Lord of hosts. So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously" Malachi 2:14, 16.
Every marriage is called to be an earthly picture of God's heavenly covenant with His church. To show His unconditional love. John 15 tells us to remain in Jesus' love. Let His words inspire you to be a channel of God's love to your spouse.
Kendrick finished The Love Dare by declaring that love is too holy a treasure to trade in for another, and too powerful a bond to be broken without dire consequences. Amen to that! Take some time to thank God for the good in your marriage, and pray to Him for strengh and love, that you may show Christ to your spouse, even when it seems unbearable. Dare to take hold of your marriage and never let go.
Dare 40: Write out a renewal of your vows and place them in your home. Make it a living testament to the value of marriage in God's eyes and the high honor of being one with your mate.
Dare 39: Love never fails.
Dare 38: Be extravagant.
Dare 37: Pray together.
Dare 36: Read the Bible daily.
Dare 35: Seek guidance in a mentor.
Dare 34: Celebrate godliness.
Dare 33: Complete each other.
Dare 32: Satisfy your spouse's needs.
Dare 31: Spouse=Top Priority of Earthly Relationships.
Dare 30: Be unified.
Dare 29: Express your love.
Dare 28: Sacrifice.
Dare 27: Encourage.
Dare 26: Seek forgiveness.
Dare 25: Forgive freely.
Dare 24: Kill lust.
Dare 23: Love protects.
Dare 22: Love your spouse. Period.
Dare 21: Be satisfied in God.
Dare 20: Commit to love Jesus so you can love your spouse.
Dare 19: Pray for God to change your heart.
Dare 18: Study each other.
Dare 17: Promote intimacy.
Dare 16: Love intercedes.
Dare 15: Honor each other.
Dare 14: Delight in each other.
Dare 13: Fight fair.
Dare 12: Let the other win.
Dare 11: Cherish each other.
Dare 10: Love unconditionally.
Dare 9: Greet well.
Dare 8: Don't be jealous.
Dare 7: Believe the best.
Dare 6: Don't be irritable.
Dare 5: Don't be rude.
Dare 4: Be thoughtful.
Dare 3: Be selfless.
Dare 2: Be kind.
Dare 1: Be patient.
Thank you for going through these dares with me. If you're married, I hope they blessed your marriage as they did mine! If you aren't, I hope you start practicing these dares now so that your marriage will be blessed by a love unimaginable. Just because the dares are over--dare yourself everyday! Love conquers all. Praise Jesus!
--Inspired by Kendrick's, "The Love Dare"
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Dare 39
"Love never fails." -1 Corinthians 13:8
Let me repeat that. Love never fails. "Though threatened, it keeps pursuing. Though challenged, it keeps moving forward. Though mistreated and rejected, it refuses to give up" (Kendrick). God's love never fails. And if you are a Christian, you have the Holy Spirit in you, which is unchanging. That same Holy Spirit possesses Jesus' unchanging love, and you have that within you. Love that is from God is unending, unstoppable. No matter what the reaction the recipient of your love gives, love keeps giving. When rejected, love loves on. When accepted, love loves on.
In Matthew 26, Jesus confirms to the disciples that He will never fall away. After Peter denied Him, Jesus still loved. His men failed Him, within hours of echoing Jesus' words, that they would never fall away either. Yet He never stopped loving them, because He and His love are "the same yesterday and today and forever." (Heb. 13:8)
This is a hard lesson to grasp, especially when I have many friends who have been through a divorce, or their marriage is on a rocky path, or they are going through a divorce. God hates divorce. No matter what the reason. While adultery gives reason for a spouse to leave the other, God doesn't smile when a wife or husband gets out of that situation. As a married woman of the Lord, I know that Zane and I are suppose to represent Christ and the church in our marriage. No matter what happens in our marriage, if either of us ever gives up and walks away, we can no longer together represent the forgiveness, redemption, and reconcilation that comes with Christ. God can redeem anyone, and anyone's marriage. I'm not in any way (please don't mistake me) saying that reconciliation is easy. Being refined is painful. Especially when the one who promised to love you most in this world betrays you. But please don't underestimate the power of God. "When you have done everything within your power to obey God, your spouse may still forsake you and walk away--just as Jesus' followers did to Him. But if your marriage fails, if your spouse walks away, let it not be because you gave up or stopped loving them" (Kendrick).
No challenge or circumstance can occur that will ever put an expiration date on Jesus or His love. And your love is made of the same unchanging characteristics. On your wedding day, you accepted your spouse as God's gift to you and promised to love them until death. Your love is greater still.
"He delights in unchanging love." Micah -7:18
Dare 39: Write a letter of commitment and resolve to your spouse. One that says, "even if you don't like what you're reading--even if you don't like me--I choose to love you anyway. Forever." And put it in a place that your mate will find it.
Dare 38: Be extravagant.
Dare 37: Pray together.
Dare 36: Read the Bible daily.
Dare 35: Seek guidance in a mentor.
(For previous dares, refer to earlier entries.)
--Inspired by Kendrick's, "The Love Dare"
Let me repeat that. Love never fails. "Though threatened, it keeps pursuing. Though challenged, it keeps moving forward. Though mistreated and rejected, it refuses to give up" (Kendrick). God's love never fails. And if you are a Christian, you have the Holy Spirit in you, which is unchanging. That same Holy Spirit possesses Jesus' unchanging love, and you have that within you. Love that is from God is unending, unstoppable. No matter what the reaction the recipient of your love gives, love keeps giving. When rejected, love loves on. When accepted, love loves on.
In Matthew 26, Jesus confirms to the disciples that He will never fall away. After Peter denied Him, Jesus still loved. His men failed Him, within hours of echoing Jesus' words, that they would never fall away either. Yet He never stopped loving them, because He and His love are "the same yesterday and today and forever." (Heb. 13:8)
This is a hard lesson to grasp, especially when I have many friends who have been through a divorce, or their marriage is on a rocky path, or they are going through a divorce. God hates divorce. No matter what the reason. While adultery gives reason for a spouse to leave the other, God doesn't smile when a wife or husband gets out of that situation. As a married woman of the Lord, I know that Zane and I are suppose to represent Christ and the church in our marriage. No matter what happens in our marriage, if either of us ever gives up and walks away, we can no longer together represent the forgiveness, redemption, and reconcilation that comes with Christ. God can redeem anyone, and anyone's marriage. I'm not in any way (please don't mistake me) saying that reconciliation is easy. Being refined is painful. Especially when the one who promised to love you most in this world betrays you. But please don't underestimate the power of God. "When you have done everything within your power to obey God, your spouse may still forsake you and walk away--just as Jesus' followers did to Him. But if your marriage fails, if your spouse walks away, let it not be because you gave up or stopped loving them" (Kendrick).
No challenge or circumstance can occur that will ever put an expiration date on Jesus or His love. And your love is made of the same unchanging characteristics. On your wedding day, you accepted your spouse as God's gift to you and promised to love them until death. Your love is greater still.
"He delights in unchanging love." Micah -7:18
Dare 39: Write a letter of commitment and resolve to your spouse. One that says, "even if you don't like what you're reading--even if you don't like me--I choose to love you anyway. Forever." And put it in a place that your mate will find it.
Dare 38: Be extravagant.
Dare 37: Pray together.
Dare 36: Read the Bible daily.
Dare 35: Seek guidance in a mentor.
(For previous dares, refer to earlier entries.)
--Inspired by Kendrick's, "The Love Dare"
Monday, September 13, 2010
Dare 38
"Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart." -Psalm 37:4
Love fulfills dreams. It brings me great sadness when I hear people talk about 'everything they had to give up' when they got married. Marriage should give you wings you didn't know you had. Not clip the ones you were growing crippling you from ever taking flight!
What is something your spouse would really, really love? It doesn't have to be something expensive. Fortunately, Zane likes inexpensive things (I say fortunately for our finances sake, but I do love giving gifts!). What he really loves is an unexpected kiss, or an excited smile on my face just to let him know I'm crazy about him even more now then back in college. I have a journal that I have kept since our first date. He gets a huge smile when he finds a new entry that he didn't know existed (as long as it includes something good...not a recent argument).
Sometimes in marriage, we can get so accustomed to saying 'no' that we can make our spouse feel worthless--like the opinion doesn't carry weight, and they don't have your respect. But love sometimes needs to be extravagant. Blessing because it wants to...blessing because that is what love does. Sometimes your love for your spouse may not feel like putting forth any effort...but let me allow Kendrick to put both of us in our place: "Hasn't God's love met needs in your heart that once seemed out of the question? You were living under such a load of sin and regret you thought you'd never earn your way back into His good graces. But He looked at you with love and said you didn't have to. He wanted you back. He wanted you to realize your need for Him, and that as you repented and turned to Him, He would love and forgive you." "God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, amde us alive together with Christ" Ephesians 2: 4-5. And another love letter in Romans 5, verse 8: "God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."
He's your model. He's the One your love is designed to imitate. Though you weren't a likely candidate for His love, He gave it anyway. He paid the price. (Kendrick) So even when you don't feel like loving, do it anyway. God calls us to. He demands it. And nothing He tells us to do does He make us do alone. He is by us willing and able to get our hearts into loving extravagantly!
1)love calls you to listen to what your mate is saying and hoping for
2)love calls you to remember the things that are unique to your relationship, the pleasures and enjoyments that bring a smile to the other's face
3)love calls you to give when it would be a lot more convenient to wait
4)love calls you to daydream about these opportunities so regularly that their desires become yours as well
Love fulfills dreams. It brings me great sadness when I hear people talk about 'everything they had to give up' when they got married. Marriage should give you wings you didn't know you had. Not clip the ones you were growing crippling you from ever taking flight!
What is something your spouse would really, really love? It doesn't have to be something expensive. Fortunately, Zane likes inexpensive things (I say fortunately for our finances sake, but I do love giving gifts!). What he really loves is an unexpected kiss, or an excited smile on my face just to let him know I'm crazy about him even more now then back in college. I have a journal that I have kept since our first date. He gets a huge smile when he finds a new entry that he didn't know existed (as long as it includes something good...not a recent argument).
Sometimes in marriage, we can get so accustomed to saying 'no' that we can make our spouse feel worthless--like the opinion doesn't carry weight, and they don't have your respect. But love sometimes needs to be extravagant. Blessing because it wants to...blessing because that is what love does. Sometimes your love for your spouse may not feel like putting forth any effort...but let me allow Kendrick to put both of us in our place: "Hasn't God's love met needs in your heart that once seemed out of the question? You were living under such a load of sin and regret you thought you'd never earn your way back into His good graces. But He looked at you with love and said you didn't have to. He wanted you back. He wanted you to realize your need for Him, and that as you repented and turned to Him, He would love and forgive you." "God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, amde us alive together with Christ" Ephesians 2: 4-5. And another love letter in Romans 5, verse 8: "God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us."
He's your model. He's the One your love is designed to imitate. Though you weren't a likely candidate for His love, He gave it anyway. He paid the price. (Kendrick) So even when you don't feel like loving, do it anyway. God calls us to. He demands it. And nothing He tells us to do does He make us do alone. He is by us willing and able to get our hearts into loving extravagantly!
1)love calls you to listen to what your mate is saying and hoping for
2)love calls you to remember the things that are unique to your relationship, the pleasures and enjoyments that bring a smile to the other's face
3)love calls you to give when it would be a lot more convenient to wait
4)love calls you to daydream about these opportunities so regularly that their desires become yours as well
Love dares you to think in terms of overwhelming your spouse with love!
Dare 38: Ask yourself what your mate would want if it was obtainable. Commit this to prayer, and start mapping out a plan for meeting some (if not all) of their desires, to whatever level you possibly can.
Dare 37: Pray together.
Dare 36: Read the Bible daily.
Dare 35: Seek guidance in a mentor.
Dare 34: Celebrate godliness.
(For previous dares, refer to earlier entries.)
--Inspired by Kendrick's "The Love Dare"
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